Tag: life

Pain

Pain

You asked me why I make my life so hard
I’m not sure it’s like that
Maybe it’s just that I don’t care
That I don’t do anything to stop it
But why?
I guess when one fears the hard times
The burn in one’s arms
The lead in one’s bones
The fatigue that smothers like a blanket
That fear itself
Can do all that and more
Always running from pain
That’s only temporary
That won’t consume my soul.

But maybe it’s not that
Maybe it’s the contrast
The old cliche
No light without dark
I always identify with people who have known pain
In a life full of pleasure, the absence feels like pain
In a life full of struggle, pleasure feels like manna from Heaven
On a journey with no food or drink
Legs aching full of hunger and thirst
The first sight of civilization
The first sip of water, bite of food
These are worth living for
When one returns from a walk home in the cold rain
Fleeing thunder and lightning
Soaked to the bone
And you walk through the door to a warm home
The deep breath
The feeling of peace.

Or maybe it’s to train
For the next shoe to drop
It always will
And that’s ok
To be afraid of pain is to intensify it
But I greet pain as an old friend
Coming for a visit
Who will leave
And one day return again.

Flaws

Flaws

They say our flaws are what make us human
We’ve more than our fair share.
Pieces broken, splintered
Things we’ve had to bear.

But there can be an odd beauty
In light reflected from broken glass
The sound as it falls to the ground
A torn blanket on green grass

And the pain we feel
It comes and goes
Is replaced by smiles and laughs
One day will return

But we’re still here
Broken pieces and all
Marching on
Till the end.

Moving forward (not moving on)

Moving forward (not moving on)

It still doesn’t quite feel right
Like the world put on a coat two sizes too tight
Like it’s all squeezed, uncomfortable
Close to right, but all wrong

I keep looking at my phone
I keep expecting to hear it ring
Hear your voice saying hey bro, what’s going on?
Do you have time to talk?

The places we were together are a little emptier now.
A little colder. A little quieter.
It’s still weird that you’re not here
We were together our whole lives
You used to never leave me alone

It was supposed to be me and you against the world.
Brothers to the end
We were supposed to go through the tough times together
And the good times too

We had a lot of those.
I guess I’ll have some more to come
And I guess you’ll be there too.
Every Step.
I couldn’t leave you behind if I tried to
So many of the best parts of me are really pieces of you.

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Turn the Other Cheek

Turn the Other Cheek

Pain makes us not our best selves. When they hurt us with their hands or with their mouths, we want to strike back. Fight fire with fire, help them reap what they sew, restore balance to the world. It is understandable. It is part of our nature. But we can be better.

The hate that we give is a reflection of what they gave to us. It’s what they want. It is what allows them to see us as less than human. Whether they can’t see the humanity inside others or they can’t see it inside themselves, we are just confirming their suspicion.

So transform the hate into humanity, darkness into light. When they give you hate, give them love. Because when they look into the mirror, we want them to see the human being inside of us and remember that no matter how deep it is buried, there is a human inside of them.

 

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The Canyon

The Canyon

Walking slowly, guided by stone walls that
Rise beside me, thousands of feet in the air.
Evidence of the power of patience,
In millions of years, water can wear down stone.

In the same way, we need to turn our will
To pursue our goals. Flowing around barriers
Until they are worn away with time.
We have time. Be patient and do not waver.

But before you fix your path, choose wisely
Which direction you pursue. How does it help?
What does it achieve? So that at the end
When we look back on the canyon we wore

In the stone of the world, we find it beautiful.
We can never put the stone back in place.

 

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The Best Days of My Life

These days I feel I’m invincible
Ready to take on the world alone
I break rules, I escape gravity’s pull,
Ready to disprove everything known.
(They all say these are the best days of my life.)

A few years later I have hit my stride
I have a career, I am somebody.
I have accomplishments, family, pride,
I have everything I could want and more.
(I guess maybe these are the best days of my life.)

Now I move slow but with a twinkle in my eye
I’ve lived a long life full of joy and some strife
But when I look in my grandson’s eyes I know
That these are the best days of my life.

 

Life is Short

Life is short. I learned that from you.

Well, I guess I already knew

in my head

but you made it real. Visceral.

You were 100% here and then you were gone.

A light that shone too bright to last long.

 

I feel it in my bones now

When I think about you

And your words.

When you’d call me brother.

 

You’re not living anymore

But I want to live like you.

Real.

Open.

Not hiding anything

ready to help anyone.

I want to help people

I want to change their lives

I want to change

the world.

And I’ll start one step at a time.

 

Thank you for being here.

For what you taught me.

Work hard. Enjoy it all. Be here while you can.

 

Life is short.

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Loss

Loss

I sit on the hard-packed earth, feeling the chill
of the frozen ground, my warmth seeping out
into the air. A slight pain when my lungs fill
Before smoke billows forward, a silent shout.

There’s a chill in my heart, an empty space.
You were there. You were sick. Now you are gone.
I won’t hear your voice. I won’t see your face.
It’s like sitting in the dark waiting for the dawn-

Knowing it won’t come. The blink of an eye,
That’s all we are. But we are so much more,
The love we give others, the reasons why.
You were my coach. My friend. My mentor.

I’ll keep the memories, the lessons, the fun.
You called me brother. I loved you like one.

You’re only 22

You’re only 22

It is easy to fall into despair

When you look at your life and can’t tell what

You’ve done that matters. Why anyone should care

If you disappear. When it sinks, your gut,

Realizing that the things you want most

Are always floating just out of your reach.

When it feels your work is nothing to boast

About, that you have nothing you can teach

And it feels like you don’t know anything.

But that just means that you must press onward

And build, grow. You’re young. Your heart might yet sing

With happiness, more beautiful than birdsong.

Life’s a journey you’ve just begun. It’s true.

Never give up on yourself, you’re only twenty two.

Live

Live

 

Give friendship, give trust freely and without cause-

Make fast friends, slow enemies.

If others hurt you, take advantage of you, persevere:

Succeed even when they stack all odds against you.

Forgive others who harm you, but remember to protect yourself in the future.

Keep your expectations low and be prepared to do it all yourself

Let kindness from others amaze you as the wonderful gift it is.

Help others, go above an beyond expectations

Not with any expectation of benefit, but because you want to.

Take joy in raising others up and raise yourself up even when others push you down.

Realize that this is your own personal truth, not the same as anyone else’s

Not better, not worse,

And that the only universal wrong is the intentional harm of others.

Live this life. You may not always be happy. You may not always succeed.

But I truly hope that you will always find peace.